thorki:

I JUST SAW A GUY AT WALMART AND HE LOOKED LIKE MORGAN FREEMAN AND HE CAUGHT ME LOOKING AT HIM AND HE POINTED AT ME AND SAID “IM NOT MORGAN FREEMAN”

lavendertowns:

twas the night before christmas and all through the house

not a sound could be heard except the click of my mouse

dekutree:

there’s this guy that looks just like will.i.am at my school and i whisper “let the beat rock” every time he passes me and he always just looks around trying to find who said it

hatrickstump:

today in history class we had this easy quiz and the question was who is the vice president and i raised my hand to say joe biden but i accidentally said joe jonas 

myynt:

i hate bugs that fly, jump, crawl, dougie, twerk, 2 step, all that shit

telapathetic:

have you ever seen someone’s face and just wanted to look at them forever

kldzbop:

if you put out candles with ur fingers i will give u an award bc that is fire 

pink-vulva:

once i take my bra off, don’t ask me to do shit for u bitch bc once that bra comes off, i am clocked out of life. i am done. i am finished. i am logged the fuck out. 

vagisodium:

if someone ever kidnaps me im just going to shit my pants because they either have to wipe my ass or deal with the smell and i want them to have it rough

uoa:

never give up on your dreams

keep sleeping

smallgay:

my rapper name would be 2 stressd