livelovehep:

sunalwaysshining:

meladoodle:

what if guys came coffee… i’ll have one ejaculatte please

I just spit out my coffee

You’re supposed to swallow it

heathicorn:

am i the only one who rehearses things i might say in advance? and I don’t mean like my theoretical oscars acceptance speech i mean like what i’ll say to the pizza guy when I answer the door in my pjs

slimydad:

aztec420:

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

how does something this small even exist? is this a pig molecule? i need to lay down a while

secretlymisha:

i like how i’m not even remotely phased by anyone’s url anymore like oh look at this adorable kitten that satansbloodsacrifice reblogged from 1d-lives-inside-my-actual-vagina

kookie667:

Let’s play a game called “I’m totally joking, but would do that in a heartbeat if you were into it”

trashypunkers:

Things I Need

  • good skin
  • $$$$$
  • a tall boy that will worship me and tell me i’m pretty 

jaclcfrost:

never and i mean absolutely never let anyone tell u that u can’t go in a bouncy castle

there is a u in bouncy 

and there’s gonna be a u in that castle

1talian:

all i have is this blog and my virginity

hazelnvt:

please love me as much as you love pizza.

snazziest:

people who dont flush the toilet must be eliminated